My fellow assholes and asshole enthusiasts, proctologists and surgeons, Supreme Court Just-asses and Commanders In Cheeks, to begin I want to thank you all for being a part of this judgmental community. We appreciate all of you who participate here and have made this subreddit what it is today. Without your judgments we would be nothing.
Five years ago, Asshole #1, our dear /u/flignir needed to settle a petty office dispute over air conditioning. He was rejected by every subreddit that he tried to post to. It became clear to him that there was a need for a space on Reddit where people could ask, "Am I the asshole?" So he created the subreddit that he needed and despite being the only subscriber, he was judged by the very beginnings of this community.
This subreddit is very important to me. I firmly believe that all of us are the asshole at one point or another in our lives and that if we can acknowledge it we can work on becoming better people.
In the last few months there have been some updates to our rules. Please be mindful of these.
-Rule 1: Be Civil
This is the most important rule change we've had. For more information click here.
-Report Validation Seekers and Shitposters
We are removing these threads and not rewarding them with a flair. Please help us by reporting such threads. For more information click here.
Hey assholes and buttcheeks! I'm happy to announce that our little subreddit has now joined the big leagues. That's right. We now have...
Thank you everyone for making this sub an interesting, fun, and discussion-worthy sub. In the beginning of 2018, we had 35K subscribers. Almost exactly one year ago, near the end of February 2018, was the last day of us being a small sub. We've grown over 10x our size from a year ago, and the growth doesn't seem to be stopping any time soon!
We've had an awesome year, with one of the most dedicated mod teams out there. We've been featured on multiple news and online articles (we are not affiliated or associated and were not paid for any of these) too, which really highlights our presence on Reddit!
To celebrate our 500,000 subscribers, we are implementing a new flair level for our extremely dedicated users. The Prime Ministurd rank will be available for anyone who dares try to achieve 400 points. A few people are already close (or may have achieved it already)!
We are also asking for your input of the best ranks you can think of. We won't necessarily pick one because we want to keep flairs exclusive and limited to avoid losing their meaningless "meaning," but if we see an amazing rank with a great asshole-related pun, it might just see the light of day!
Thanks again, and happy judging!
Okay, so my wife and I are expecting our first child. She is 7 months along and we got an ultrasound yesterday to check on the progress (my wife’s medical issues caused the OBGYN to be extra cautious).
During the appointment, the tech was pointing out our daughter’s different body parts, telling us where the legs and feet are. It was the first time we didn’t really need the help, because we could see our baby looking like a real baby. My wife started crying, and I was comforting her, when she said the words. “I can’t believe I’m making a human being.”
I kept comforting her, but I waited a few minutes and, once the tech was gone, gently reminded her that we are both the parents, not just her. I also told her that saying she’s “making” the baby on her own is not accurate, since I provided half the genetic material.
My wife was still emotional at this point, and she started crying again thinking I don’t appreciate what she’s putting her body through to be pregnant. Obviously this is false, especially since her pregnancy has been so tough that I’ve attended at least two doctors appointments every month. I show her with actions, not words, that I appreciate her.
I just don’t think it’s fair to claim I haven’t contributed something to making our daughter. She is still upset the next day. So, AITA?
I love my girlfriend and Im attracted to her. I think her body is cute but I want more attraction. I want her to naturally look the best she can. I also want her to feel more confident and we both agreed losing weight would help. Some say it’s wrong to tell a woman what to do with their body but being overweight is unhealthy and it can bring more problems for us down the line. I’ve tried different approaches to encourage her to go to the gym but she always makes me feel like an asshole for anything I say and god I hope she doesn’t find this post
So I lent a friend of mine £500. He needed it to see him through til the end of the month and promised to repay me on payday. Not a problem, I trusted the guy and knew he was good for it.
Payday comes and goes, no sign of the money. I sent him a message about it. He said “oh yeah, sorry I forgot, I’ll do that now”
Two weeks pass and still nothing. I message him again. He said he’d send me the money. Still nothing. He was then avoiding me so I wasn’t able to see him face to face.
I messaged him again and he didn’t reply.
7 months have passed since the day he promised to have the money back to me by. I’ve not been able to get hold of him, nor have I seen him.
This weekend just gone, I was out at a restaurant and I happened to see him as I was being seated at my table. He was on what looked like a date.
Now at this point I could see he was acting kinda boasy because he had ordered about 5 starters. It’s worth noting that this is a pretty pricey restaurant. So I decided I’d go and say hello.
I pulled up a chair at his table and started chatting to him about how he is and how I am etc.
I then proceeded to pick up a fork and try a bit of the food. He looked a bit shocked, but it was good food so I tried something from one of the other plates. At this point his date (I’d learnt that this was their second date) said to me, “excuse me, but this is our food. What do you think you’re doing?”
I looked at her and said “Well since I’m pretty much funding this meal, I figured I may as well sample what my money is getting.”
Try to keep this as brief as possible. Girlfriend and I have been together 2 years, were recently looking to move in together. She was going to spend the rest of the month in her apartment then move into my place, and she's been spending most days over here anyway gradually moving some of her stuff in.
This is fucking gross, so fair warning. For the three days straight she's been over I've noticed an odd smell when I picked up my toothbrush. I wasn't sure what it was so I rinsed it and kept using it as normal. One morning she asked me if I had noticed anything different, but refused to elaborate when I asked for an explanation so I was on high alert now. I left my phone running in the washroom peaking out of the towel cabinet that faces the sink, and I totally get how invasive that was and if it turned out I was wrong I was prepared to admit to it and accept the consequences for my assumptions as they came. I know I'm the asshole for that, but that's not what I'm asking.
Turns out she had been rubbing my toothbrush inside her pants in the mornings as she wakes up before me and putting it back in the container. When I got my phone and seen the video I was livid, and confronted her immediately. She reacted like it was a gigantic joke, laughing, trying to hug me and saying she wanted to see how long it'd take for me to figure it out. Apparently she viewed it as a prank.
I felt incredibly disgusted and betrayed, I feel like it's disrespectful and not at all a prank and it's unhygienic. It's not even like she did it once, she had been doing it for days. I told her to get the stuff that she had brought over in the past few days and leave, that I didn't want to be with her anymore.
She's absolutely dumbfounded I could see this as anything other than a harmless prank. It's her opinion that it shouldn't matter because I washed it before use anyway. On one hand, she's been so inconsolable and has been begging me to reconsider so much that I'm second guessing my decision to end it and wondering whether I'm being too harsh. On the other hand, if this is her idea of a prank and the sort of thing she can do, not only do I not trust her in my house around my stuff, I don't trust her in general. Am I the asshole if I want to end things?
A group of my friends and I went out for brunch yesterday after a St Patrick’s day event. There were 7 of us and we had a server who was not shy about sharing his ultra right wing views about immigrants.
We told the server we were just trying to have a nice brunch and would rather not hear about his political beliefs. Unfortunately he wouldn’t shut up about undocumented immigrants and the Chinese/Mexicans/etc every time he came to our table.
Some of us found it funny, funny in the sense that every time he came over we were waiting for the next outrageous thing to come out of his mouth. But I thought he was kind of rude to keep mumbling these political rants despite us telling him it’s not appreciated.
Instead of leaving him a real tip, I left a penny and a note suggesting he shouldn’t impose his politics on his customers. One of my friends thought that was kind of shitty especially since we were a large party and the server had to work on Sunday. But I didn’t think so. Was it shitty for me to do that?
So, this is the third time my roommate has left the door open to the house when leaving. The first time my girlfriend and I were understanding and asked her to be more considerate. The second time it happened was a week later, I didn’t tell my girlfriend about it because I knew she would be furious. So I text her and told her I was really upset with her over the issue.
All this leading up to her once again leaving the door open. This time though our cat vanelope got out on a cold night and got lost. We spent 6 days looking for her, hanging up posters and asking neighbors if they had seen her. Finally a neighbor found her and told us to come pick her up and that she was hurt pretty badly. 4 days at the emergency vets and $1600 later she passed away.
At no time did the roommate in question express any real sympathy or apologize for what she had done. We have cut her out of our lives as much as possible. It’s hard to see her and not want to scream at the top of my lungs. This all happened 3 months ago so her window to make amends has shut in my eyes. So am I a dick for wanting her to leave?
TL:DL: roommate let our cat out and she died, am I the asshole for shunning her and wanting her to move out?
Judging you right now
A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole.